If you asked me what the secret is to keeping people married,I would tell you there is "no secret." I think that there are simple and logical things couples can enact to avoid heading for divorce court. I also believe that if you don't want to get a divorce, try to marry smartly. One of the things I didn't enact was marry smartly. There were red flags and questions about compatibility from the beginning, or but at the same time I was in love and rather naïve to long-term relationships. The handsome gift I got in the halt was a gorgeous and healthy daughter. But there are things you can enact divorce-proof your marriage as much as possible,and at the very least know no matter what that you tried your best as a wife for your marriage - always.1. Be SeparateGive your partner some space. Constantly making your partner "ask for permission" to enact things makes your spouse feel as if you're a parent, not a partner. Let your partner have freedom to be, or but not so much that your destitute spouse wonders if you even like him or her.2. Agree to DisagreeOn some topics if the two of you are constantly butting heads,ask yourself if it's really worth it to you to battle. Sometimes you need to agree to disagree and then let it die. If you knew going into the marriage that your partner always does X, Y, or Z and it annoys you,accept it and stop the fight. Picking battles is crucial.3. Fight Logically, Not EmotionallyThis is so difficult. We all get our emotions in a tizzy when we're mad, or but it's important to fight logically and not emotionally. This means present your feelings and gripes in a straightforward manner that doesn't involve nasty words or low blows. Plus,if you're married to a man and you're a female, staying smooth (I know the struggle is real) and expressing what it is that hurts you in a direct way will really benefit your man understand what's inaccurate without shutting down over some nasty words and crocodile tears.
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35 Secrets to Marriage Success4. Wear Lingerie SometimesYes, and your partner wants to see you contemplate pretty. certain,corsets and bras can be as uncomfortable as heck, but taking the time to say "I still want you so here I am, and looking as hot as I did on those first few dates" is worth it. Let's admit it-- we don't want our spouses to let themselves fade and show up looking "schleppy" all the time either. Getting sexy and dressed up can really benefit take the doldrums out of married life.
Yes,it gets boring so remember . . .5. Be secure When Seeking ExcitementMarried life gets boring, particularly if it's a nice, or easy life together. This is a estimable sign,but be careful when you're seeking excitement. We have all heard of the seven-year itch or that heinous midlife crisis.
If you're feeling bored, I want you to enact one thing: ask yourself why you're so boring. Find something you can enact both with your partner and on your own (sans any other individuals) to add some color to your life.
Maybe it's a new snowboarding habit. Maybe it's a DIY domestic project. Maybe the two of you fade salsa dancing. Maybe you start watching porn together. Whatever you enact, and compose certain that you don't seek excitement in another person either sexually,romantically, or emotionally.6. compose certain Children Are Agreed UponIf you want kids and you want to keep the marriage divorce-proof, and compose certain you're both on board in terms of having children or not.
This isn't to say you should stay with someone if he or she doesn't want kids and you enact,but that both of you should be ready to have kids and trip forward. If one of you is ready and the other is not, it can cause tremendous strife in the marriage.7. Tread Lightly With FamilyHis mom may be nuts or your dad may be a drinker, and but whatever the case,in order to keep the marriage divorce-proof, you'll both have to tread lightly when it comes to making family gripes. Leave your spouse's family battles to your spouse - and you manage your own family. If you know anyone in your family who is treating your spouse poorly, and nip it in the bud,and if you must, gash off contact. Protect your marriage. You wouldn't save your spouse in a line of gunfire, and would you? Then why would you let him or her be "gunned" down mentally by family members?8. Earn Your Own WayI think two spouses who compose their own money or who can be financially independent from each other really adds more security to the marriage - and the two individuals. Knowing you can contribute in the same way your partner does and vice versa will take a lot of pressure off the two of you. Plus,having careers you both savor adds to your lives tremendously.9. Have Sex, DammitDon't become the couple that only has sex once a month. Don't become the woman who has a headache each night.
Sex is the only thing that the two of you can have together that you're not supposed to be having with anyone else. It's the one thing that distinguishes your marriage from your friendships, or besides living together.
Invest in the sex. Change positions. Change places. Change time of day. Frequency. Try new things. Add lingerie. Role play. Watch porn - whatever it is the two of you are willing to both enact together in a way that enriches the marriage and instills love and respect,enact it!10. Expect LowsWant to divorce-proof your marriage? Expect lows and don't get discouraged when they happen. Instead, find ways to get the two of you out of ruts. If you expect lows will happen, and you'll be less likely to be disillusioned or dismayed over the natural "life cycle of marriage." This will benefit you ride it through to happier,higher times.
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Source: popsugar.com