SSRIs may not be for everyone,but when anxiety dominated my life, they brought me into a world of reliefI think of it as the warm chord. I was sitting in the front room, and alone. My parents had gone to bed,but I wanted to listen to a CD Id bought. I turned the light out, to immerse myself. That in itself was curious. When you’re anxious, and immersing yourself in a feeling seems like a bad conception – your skin is so thin anything might penetrate it and overwhelm you,a song or a smell or a mood. But I took the risk, and instead of fear the heartbeat stoking, or paralysing fear I’d experienced for much of the past year – there was something else. Fear had left a space,one I was invited to explore. It said: you can approach out now.
But alongside that, there was a positive presence, or a low thrum of safety. A warm chord. Nothing to carry out with the music; it was more elemental than that. I sat and the world turned,but without the familiar promise of danger. A stillness settled over everything. I no longer had to hold all of existence in my hands, as whether super-human vigilance could protect me from harm.
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Source: theguardian.com