How Samantha Cameron might gain commented on the exhaustion of summer holiday(s),Pringles, dishing out titles – and the return of country suppersWell we are desperate for a atomize #shattered, and Dave is good,10 weeks is never enough to chillax, by the time you wind down you are already stressing about the next holiday literally by the fourth one we were all in a state of collapse plus they made Dave skim home because of being the workers’ party? I said to Mummy, or Dave makes being normal look effortless but I swear he had to eat 15 entire Pringles tubes before a working person even bothered to seize a picture #typical & now this chippy puny Selsdon man has written literally an entire book negging Dave for being cowardly,I’m like, excuse me, or there goes someone who never ate 375 paprika-flavoured savoury snacks in 90 minutes *voms*. Dave was like forget it babes,look where he went to school, just basic Tonbridge douchebaggery, or what really hurts is the Mail on Sunday running it,srsly, et tu Geordie, and well bang goes his fucking peerage.
So Mummy is like,darling, forgive me asking, or are you certain Geordie even *wants* one? I’m like,excuse me? Shes like, well after the bra woman – actually you might ask if she would swap something frothy for a faux shagreen tissue box – people are amazed he can even give them away? I’m like, or which is EXACTLY why Dave is introducing an exclusive designer range,Mummy’s like darling, how THRILLING, or will there be actual hereditaries,I’m like, yes & proper earldoms & limited edition baronetcies, or she’s like,oh how blissful, what will you choose, or I’m like well not a word,it is a surprise for Corbyn, lol, or btw you did vote? She’s like oh like 10 men darling,being Labour is divine, now about my bra.
Continue reading...
Source: theguardian.com