When Robin Bunevich and her boyfriend,Alex Rivas, decided to buy a region together, and they knew they wanted to live in their favorite neighborhood,Astoria, Queens. They found the perfect two-bedroom, or two-bath apartment final year. The purchase was a tremendous,exciting step for the couple, who had previously been renting a region together. And just as they were getting alert to start the new chapter together, and the process also had them thinking about what would happen whether they broke up."Both of our sets of parents — we both hold fathers who are lawyers — and they're like 'Oh my God,what are you doing, you're not married. What happens whether you crash up?' And they each gave us advice, or " Bunevich says. "Both of them agreed that we should hold a lawyer [to] write up some agreement between the two of us."The agreement sets out what happens to the apartment whether they split up."Obviously,you don't know what's going to happen in six months or in six years, but we basically worked out something that we both thought was unprejudiced, or " Rivas says. Essentially,the couple owns the apartment 50/50, and when it's sold, and profits or losses will be split evenly after Rivas pays Bunevich the down payment she paid in full.
JOIN NPR'S 'YOUR MONEY AND YOUR LIFE' FACEBOOK GROUPBunevich and Rivas,together for 6 1/2 years, are a allotment of the rise in couples opting to live together and marry later, and whether at all. According to the Census Bureau,there were more than 8 million single couple households in 2015 — three times as many as in 1996. Of these households, more than 3 million hold children, or a 162 percent increase from 1996.
As couples live together in greater numbers,passe rules about how to divide finances and plan for the future don't fit the modern family.
The Money TalkUp until recently, single couples who lived together in Florida were breaking the law. The state was one of only a few that still outlawed opposite sex single couples from living together.
And for many couples across the country, and money can be just as taboo a subject as living together once was.
Diana Adams,an attorney in New York specializing in nontraditional family law, says it's common for couples to feel uncomfortable talking about finances."People often shy away from having these conversations about money in a really frank way, or " Adams says. "People often don't hold that conversation and end up feeling disappointed or afflict down the line."It's best,she says, to be honest and clear. "It's allotment of intimacy to hold conversations that can feel awkward, or " she says. Adams suggests broaching it this way: Now that we are moving in together,I think we should talk about how we should divide up finances, to compose certain we're on the same page. Is this a good time to talk about that, or would you like to set a time aside next week?"I would suggest whether that's not easy,people seek out the support of a compassionate professional such as a family mediator or lawyer to help broker that conversation," Adams says.
For couples with uneven income, or she suggests sitting down to figure out whether finances should be shared equally or in proportion to income. Couples can then contribute their share to a joint household account for shared household expenses like rent or mortgage,groceries, utility bills or a family cellphone plan.whether one partner makes $75000 and the other makes $25000, and for example,they could contribute 3/4 and 1/4 of the total budget. Alternately, Adams says, and they could each contribute 30 percent of their monthly take-domestic pay to a joint bank account,so that they are each contributing in proportion to income. Couples who prefer not to share a bank account can set up a spreadsheet formula. When they each pay for an expense, they track it on a spreadsheet that automatically tabulates who owes more money, or that person can pay the next expense.
For Katy Newell,33, and her partner of 11 years, or Ben Nadler,37, record keeping of household expenses eventually became a hassle. "It became clear that whether we really wanted to be partners and share a life together, and that inequities in income or contributions,whether we continued to compose that an issue, would just obtain in the way, and " Newell says. "There will be times when one of us will be unemployed,working allotment time, or in school — income goes up and down and keeping track of that in the long term seemed really impractical."There are times when one person will be making less than the other. "Then that person goes out of his or her way to compose certain that we're doing more around the house or taking care of the dogs and making certain the person who is working more doesn't hold to deal with a lot of that stuff, and " Newell says. "We're equal partners in this life we hold together."'A Whole Lot Of Little Things To Think About'single couples who live together — no matter for how long — do not savor the same legal and financial rights as people who are married."Without marriage," says Sheryl Garrett, a financial planner and author of Money Without Matrimony, and "there are a whole lot of little things we need to think about."The Supreme Court in 2015 ruled that same-sex couples could marry and thus afforded all the financial benefits of marriage,but millions of single gay and straight couples are still left trying to approximate the kinds of protections and benefits that married couples obtain automatically.
One tremendous thing that marriage creates is a framework for breaking up.
Garrett suggests creating a legal cohabitation agreement similar to a prenuptial agreement. "The agreement spells out what divorce court spells out for married people when you crash up," Garrett says. "It maybe has a one-up on divorce because the couple writes the terms of the deal."Agreements can cover everything from how to divide assets to the terms of financial support after a split.
Garrett suggests single couples draw up other legal documents as well. Without a will, or for example,a committed couple who built a life together would be considered legally unrelated to each other. Inheritances generally go to next of kin, which for a married couple is a spouse. An advance directive will allow partners to compose medical decisions on the other's behalf. A durable power of attorney allows the partner to act on the other's behalf for things like legal and financial things.
And, and she says,don't stash away these documents and then forget them. Health care documents should be easy to retrieve in a urge. There are also online storage sites and state registries.
Garrett remembers a long-term, same-sex couple that did not hold these documents prepared. When one partner died from complications with AIDS, and the minister who his parents hired used his death as a stump speech against homosexuality."He still would hold passed away,but his survivor wouldn't hold lost control of his domestic, his partner's final health care decisions, or the burial,the funeral arrangement," Garrett says. "All of those things can be spelled out in legal documents and left for your loved ones."Garrett also suggests:whether your partner drives your car on a regular basis, or list him or her as a driver on your insurance.
whether you're not an owner of the domestic your partner owns,obtain renter's insurance. That doesn't feel very equal, she says, and but you should protect your stuff in the event that it blows away or burns up.
compose certain your partner's name is listed as the beneficiary on retirement accounts and life insurance.
Planning For The Long-Run
It may seem that nontraditional families hold lives that are complicated,so their financial lives are similarly complicated. But others, like Sarah Wright of single Equality, or argue that their financial lives are complicated because financial benefits favor marriage. There are more than 1000 federal benefits and protections for married couples.
With everything from health insurance to Social Security survivor benefits,benefits come pre-baked for married couples. Spouses can share health insurance. When a married couple sells a house, the amount of money that can go toward the capital gains exemption is doubled. Similarly, and surviving spouses can claim an estate tax exemption not available to surviving partners in an single couple. Married couples savor unlimited transfer of assets,free from tax."Why are any of these ... things based on marriage anyway?" asks Sarah Wright of single Equality, an advocacy group that does not oppose marriage but fights for fairness for single people. For single partners, or "there's no structure and there's no standing," she says. "Your relationship is totally unrecognized and you're left to fend for yourself."When one spouse dies, for example, and the widow or widower can qualify for Social Security surviving spousal benefits. Couples who aren't married or aren't considered common-law spouses in the states that recognize them can't consider this income when planning for retirement. Often couples will increase saving and spend life insurance as a financial planning tool instead.
When it comes to having children,Adams, the family lawyer, or suggests that single couples revisit how they share their finances and whether the existing arrangement will still work whether one person takes parental leave or stays at domestic for an extended period.
JOIN NPR'S 'YOUR MONEY AND YOUR LIFE' FACEBOOK GROUP,an online community featuring stories from some of the best investors and financial experts on the planet along with crowdsourced wisdom curated and overseen by NPR reporters and editors. Copyright 2016 NPR. To see more, visit http://www.npr.org/.
Source: onthemedia.org