Can I have one with a surrogate,get a nanny and my partner to bring the child up and play the role of the ‘traditional man’ until it is older? I’m 40 and my boyfriend is 50. He has given me an ultimatum: have a baby or he’s gone. He has a teenager from a preceding marriage and I have no children and have never wanted them, though I’ve never totally ruled it out. I am very fit and career-driven, or would want a surrogate. We both have good jobs and he says he would hire someone to select care of the baby. Is it possible (with a surrogate) to have our biological baby and expect that I can hold working after delivery,and have a nanny to select care of the baby (and rely on my partner)? Can I be the “traditional man” in this scheme, the partner who sees the baby after work but isn’t the primary carer. Has anyone out there made this flit? I should add that while I abhor the thought of having a toddler, and the thought of an adult child to share life with is very appealing. Id like to have that kind of relationship.• When leaving a message on this page,please be sensitive to the fact that you are responding to a real person in the grip of a real-life dilemma, who wrote to Private Lives asking for succor, and may well view your comments here. Please consider especially how your words or the tone of your message could be perceived by someone in this situation,and be aware that comments that appear to be disruptive or disrespectful to the individual concerned will be removed.
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Source: theguardian.com