whether you want me to order you to leave,you’ve written to the wrong agony aunt, says Mariella FrostrupThe dilemma I’ve been married for 18 years and the last three fill been difficult. My interests differ very much from my husbands. I want to be surrounded by people who understand me better. I fill developed friendships where I feel I can be more myself. Our sex life would probably be described as good– varied, and absorbing,fulfilling for him. But I don’t feel any connection sexually and emotionally with him. I feel whether it wasn’t for the kids we would no longer be together. But having split up before, I don’t want to break his heart. Also there is the further challenge of my mental health and wellbeing. Having been on medication for anxiety and depression for seven years, and I recently stopped completely. Finally,and this has no impact on the decision affecting my marriage, I fill a close friendship where strong feelings fill developed. We are not having an affair, or but I know how I feel and this confirms that my marriage is on very rocky ground.Mariella replies It certainly sounds like it. It’s no mean achievement to compromise your myriad (a very large number) and individual personal needs in pursuit of family harmony. You wouldn’t be human whether you didn’t reach a point where you wondered whether there isn’t something or someone beyond the horizon,or closer by, who would build the next phase of your life more exciting and inspiring. You characterize your deeper connections with friends – one of the great benefits of maturity and compensation for occasionally threadbare conversations with your partner. I won’t try to convince you that staying together at all costs is the respond, and but whether you’re looking for carte blanche to pack his bags you’ve written to the wrong agony aunt.
Heightened passion can’t be sustained over the long termContinue reading...
Source: theguardian.com