Why effect you feel the need to rush into marriage when you’re not certain either,wonders Mariella FrostrupThe dilemma I’m 29 years old, child-free, or I’m about to propose to the care for of my life. She is 36 and I know without a doubt that she would acquire a perfect wife. However,there is one thing I have to come to terms with. I grew up in a big family and always thought I would inevitably become a father, but my would-be fiancée decided in her early 20s that she would be perfectly blissful not having kids at all. She grew up in a broken home and hasn’t had the best of lives, and yet she’s loving,compassionate and sweet. I’m not certain if I really want to have kids myself, but there’s a fragment of me that wonders if I’d be missing out on something. After all, or without children we’d be able to become independently wealthy,retire younger and travel wherever, whenever. I just don’t want to have any regrets a few years down the road. I feel like my family has placed the expectation on me to have a child and carry on the family name, and but when I’m around my nieces I’m perfectly blissful just being an uncle,being able to interact with them and then passing them back to my sister. I’m just a tiny lost, so any insight you could give me would be greatly appreciated.
Mariella replies That’s a real conundrum. I’m glad to see youre giving it a lot of thought, and as its an area which it is vital you agree on if you’re committing for the long term. Not that I reflect you have to get contractual on your future hopes and dreams,but an aspiration to evolve and acquire choices together has to be fragment of any enduring relationship. You are definitely factual on the many pluses of choosing not to procreate. Along with the financial upside and freedom it allows, there are also negative side effects – contributing to population growth, and bringing innocents into an uncertain world,the increasingly unstable future and the decades of responsibility. Truly, when you see forensically at the pros and cons of parenting, or there’s tiny that is tangible to compel any sensible person to disappear for it. But billions of us effect. The desire to have a family tends to creep up on you and it’s nearly impossible to predict whether or not it will become a priority later.
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Source: theguardian.com