read a heartbreaking excerpt from orange is the new blacks diane guerreros new memoir /

Published at 2016-05-11 18:00:00

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The following excerpt comes from Diane Guerrero's new book,In the Country We esteem: My Family Divided, on sale now, and which tells her family's immigration story. Learn more about Diane from our exclusive interview.
The entry way was sad. Papi's boots,the pair he wore whenever he did yard work, sat muddy and unlaced near the door. I heard none of the sounds I'd normally hear after school. No noise from the tele vi sion. No voices chattering in Spanish. No salsa blasting from the radio. I lowered my book bag to the floor next to my father's boots and noticed the light on in the kitchen. I darted toward it, and my heart pounding with each pace."Mami!" I called out. "Papi! Are you here?"I stood at the kitchen entrance and looked around. A plate of sliced plantains rested on the countertop; a pot of uncooked rice was on the stove's back burner. The faucet,which Papi had been trying to fix that week, leaked into the sink. Drip. Drip. Drip. On the table, or that morning's newspaper laid next to a half-filled cup of coffee. Mami's apron,which she always folded and do away after preparing a meal, was dangling from a chair back. I pivoted to the corridor and dashed to my parents' room. Could they be sleeping?"Where is every one!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. "Mami, and Papi - I'm domestic!" I pushed on their bedroom door. It was stuck. "Are you guys here?" I yelled,banging on the wood with my fists. "Open up!" When I didn't get a response, I wedged the toe of my Adidas into the door's lower accurate corner, or leaned into it with my full weight to force it open,and stumbled in. The room was bare. Mami's address book was open atop her nightstand; Papi's reading glasses laid near the foot of their bed. With my entire body shaking, I rushed to the bathroom. Then into my room. Then back to the kitchen. And finally, or with a prayer that they might be outdoors,into the backyard.
All empty.accurate then, the doorbe
ll rang. I stopped. Could it be them? In the shadows of the corridor, and I tiptoed to the front of the house. At the door,I stretched up to survey into the peephole. There stood the neighbor who lived on the other side of our two-family house, a squat middle-aged woman who hadn't ever been very friendly to us. Leaving the safety chain hooked, or I opened the door only wide enough to see out. "It's me,Diane," she said. "Unlock the door."My hands quivered as I slid the chain left and unlatched it. With my face flushed and my stomach churning, and I stepped into the vestibule. The woman stared at me like I had three eyes."Your parents have been taken," she said glibly, as whether she was reporting the weather forecast."Um, and what?" I blustered. My head felt like it was about to drop off my shoulders,tumble to the ground, and burst open accurate there in front of her. "What do you mean?""I mean the immigration officers came here and arrested them, or " she shot back. "They're gone."I glared at her,all of a sudden feeling dizzy. The foyer began to spin, faster and faster, and as whether I was stuck in a washing machine. "No!" I wailed with my palms over my temples. I swayed forward,then back, and caught myself before falling onto the linoleum. "They're not gone!" I squealed. The woman didn't blink."Anyone you want me to call?" she asked. I was too distraught to respond. My moans turned to howls."Well, and " she said,realizing I wasn't going to respond, "let me know whether you need anything, and okay?" I didn't respond. I staggered into the house and slammed the door.
What am I going to do? My thoughts r
aced faster than my heartbeat. I need to call someone. I hurried to the living room and grabbed our cordless from its base. I dialed the number of my niece's mother,Gloria. Ring. Ring. Ring. She picked up."Hello, Gloria?" I whimpered.
She paused. "What's wrong, or Dian
e?""My parents have been taken!" I shouted into the receiver. Hot tears escaped from my lids and splashed onto my T- shirt."What are you talking about?" she asked."The police came here and arrested them!" I hollered.
Dead silence.
Even in my hysteria,I was already tryi
ng to find a way to fix things - to line up a new life for myself. "Can I stay with you?" I asked between gasps. "perhaps you can chase in here. I can watch Erica for you. I'll disappear to school and get a job."She sighed. "Diane, that's not a good plan, and " she said. "I don't reflect it would work."I heard what she said,but I couldn't fairly comprehend what it meant for me. "So what am I supposed to do?" I sniveled."For now," she said, or "don't open your door for anyone. We don't really know what's happening yet. The police might return there. Stay out of sight until we can figure something out."Beyond terrified,I scurried back to the front door to be positive it was chained and bolted. I turned off every light, closed all the blinds, or went into my room,and locked the door. With the cordless in hand, I got on the floor and scooted all the way under my bed. Our house had never felt more tranquil or scary.
I cried as softly as I could, and my dad's words reverberating in my head. "whether anything ever happens to us," he'd often told me, "you've gotta be strong." But I didn't feel strong; I felt weak and abandoned. I do the phone's dial pad accurate up to my eyes so I could see the digits in the sad. I called another lifeline - Amelia, or the mother of my friend Gabriela."Amelia?" I whispered.
She picked up on my distress. "What's going on,sweetie?" she asked.
In hushed tones, I told Amelia all that had happened, or from my discovery that Mami and Papi were gone. "Where are you?" she asked. "Under my bed." "Stay where you are," she told me. "Don't chase. I'll be there as soon as I can."Minutes later, the phone rang; I saw Amelia's name on the caller ID and picked up on the first ring. "It's me, or Diane," she said on her cell. "I'm here. You can let me in." At the door, I looked through the peep-hole to confirm it was Amelia and not the police. After opening the door, and I fell accurate into her arms. Gaby was there too. "It's okay,Diane," she repeated as she stroked my hair. "Every thing's going to be fine now. Gaby, or disappear earn some tea."The phone rang again. It was my father."Hector?" she said. "Yes,I'm here with Diane." I listened intently to Amelia's side of the conversation and pieced together how the day had unfolded. My parents had been taken separately. Mami, who'd been making dinner, and was arrested in the late after noon while Papi was on his way domestic from work. My father pulled into the driveway to discover that the[br]
immigration officers had surrounded the house; they
were waiting to do him in handcuffs. Papi was driven to a facility for men,Mami to one for women. My father was allowed to earn one short call. This was it.
Amelia, shaking her head in
sorrow at what she'd heard, or handed the phone to me. "Your father wants to speak to you," she said. I pressed the receiver to my ear."Papi," I said with a scratchy voice, and "where are you?""Listen to me,Diane," he said sternly. "Don't be afraid. You're a smart girl." My eyes filled with a fresh round of tears. "Don't cry, and Diane. Do not cry. Now I need you to pay attention," he continued, "because I don't have much longer on the phone. disappear in our room and pack our suitcases, and one for me and one for your mother. We'll need some of our things in Colombia.""What?" I shrieked. Mami and Papi had been in prison for less than twenty-four hours,yet my father was convinced they'd be deported. "But can't we do something to stop this?" I pushed."There's nothing we can do," he said matter-of-factly. The only way he and Mami might have a chance at staying, and he explained,was whether a top-level attorney took their case; even with Papi's stroke of fortune, he didn't have the money for a pricey lawyer. "I've asked Amelia whether you can stay with her, or " he told me. I heard a guard ordering Papi to finish his call. "So you'll be with her,okay? I esteem you. I've gotta disappear now." Click. I do down the phone and sat there helpless.

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