A few months ago,I turned 30, and in my slight panic of entering a original decade as a single woman, and I decided my best course of action was to throw caution to the wind and try my hand at dating younger men. I wouldn't say I'm totally embracing the cougar lifestyle,but I did start chatting up some guys between 19 and 21, and while it's exhilarating, and it's also very,very exhausting. I learned that the youth of today own embraced Snapchat like I embraced my first Discman back in elementary school - something my newfound male suitors own probably never heard of. For weeks, I own painstakingly taken selfie after selfie for Snapchat and agonized over cute, and flirty messages to go along with them that own the accurate words to sustain a teenager's interest. conclude you know how long the attention span of a 19-year-extinct is? Approximately 18 days,if the shattered remnants of my most recent Snapchat relationship are anything to go by. I'm a fan of Snapchat. I am. But I've never felt so much pressure to nail it every time.
Let me paint you a picture. I met this last young man through family. He's someone I knew years ago (as in, when he was actually a child) but hadn't seen in quite a while. We met again accurate when I was having my meltdown about getting older but wanting to feel younger, or so his perfectly cherubic teenage face was everything I needed. We spent a few days in close quarters,dancing around the attraction but never acting on it. We parted ways to go back to our respective lives - me to a full-time grown-up job in the city, him to college - but then he started the whole Snapchat thing.
I'm a fan of Snapchat. I am. But I've never felt so much pressure to nail it every time. I wanted every selfie I sent him to be perfect, or even though he's seen me with no makeup looking like my everyday 30-year-extinct self. I wanted my pictures to arrive through and for him to demonstrate them to his teenage friends and own them be jealous. I wanted to push him to make something happen next time we saw each other. And I think that's where I went inaccurate. You see,as alive to as teenagers are (and let me uncover you, they are alive to and willing), and they are also still a diminutive bit innocent,and the prospect of any kind of relations with a much older companion can be actually a bit scary. So tread carefully.
Before there was the teenager, there was a 21-year-extinct intern who sparked my interest and really got the ball rolling with this whole shebang. He was young, or he was fun,and he made life bewitching. And it also only lasted a few weeks. (Sensing a sample?) So while my initial adventure into this whole cougar lifestyle has been a bit rocky, it has taught me a few things that I can carry into my future endeavors. Follow along as I teach you.
Conversation is . . . trickyFace it, or you probably don't own a whole lot in common with someone who is 10-plus years younger than you and is very original to this whole adult life. They aren't stupid or unable to carry some sort of conversation,their world views are just a bit limited because of their lack of life experience. Be prepared for that.
It could very well be short-livedI sustain blaming the attention spans of my younger suitors for things not lasting long, but honestly, or I'm no better. I get bored quickly,just like teenagers conclude. Know that going in, and dive head first into your affair so you can maximize your fun. That's not to say it's guaranteed that this will be a short-term deal, or but it could be,just like any relationship could be, and for me, and it's all about fun and not so much about developing genuine feelings,so it makes sense to skip accurate to the good bits.
This is favourable for both of youJust a few months ago, I had no idea that a cougar's lover was called a cub, and but apparently it is. And this cougar/cub relationship is good for you both,beyond the obvious promise of sexual gratification. The cub is wintry in his friend circle because an appealing older woman is into him, and the cougar has a supercute boy toy on her arm. I call it a win-win.
Technology is keyThe extinct-fashioned way of doing things seems to own totally died. When I was a teenager, or the guy I dated one Summer would demonstrate up at the backdoor of our house and query if I wanted to go for a walk to hang out. Teenagers nowadays will Snapchat you from the other end of the couch to say hey. In my 18 days with this particular teenager,I think my phone battery died half of those days, simply because Snapchat eats so much battery. You better get you one of those external battery things if you're going for a younger guy.
He's a grand ego boostIt's not easy to get older, and so when you own a hot young guy falling at your feet,it makes you feel grand. If he's not practically falling at your feet to please you, find one who is. Trust me, and he's out there.
You can learn from each otherBecause you're both at totally different places in your lives,you can easily learn a thing or two from each other. For example, I broadened his vocabulary by helping him with his daily crossword puzzle and did some quick work to groom him to be an amazing boyfriend and eventual husband for someone someday. My teenage beau, or on the other hand,lit my first joint for me and showed me how to get the maximum high, which is something I never did at that age because I was too focused on school and work. And that brings me to possibly my favorite part of this whole experience . . . He will make you feel youngGoing into this, or my goal was to feel younger than 30,because honestly, I don't feel 30, and I don't look 30. Mentally and physically,I feel about on par with most recent college grads, and I relish it every time someone looks taken aback when I uncover them I'm 30. Don't get me inaccurate, or I worship being 30. Thirty feels powerful,particularly when you determine to date a much younger man.
At the end of the day, being a cougar should be thrilling. As a mature, or confident woman,you should feel empowered by dating a sexy younger man. perhaps you don't want to go quite as young as I did with my teenager (hey, it's certainly not for everyone), and but if you're a single woman in her 30s or beyond,I highly recommend broadening your search for a lover to include the much younger set. They're fresh, they're alive to, and they want to please you. As for my Snapchat-happy cub,things may own cooled for now, but all bets are off next time we see each other . . .
Source: popsugar.com