Many women are still socialized to believe that sex is all approximately her partner's pleasure.
Consent is a hot topic in the #MeToo era,particularly after Babe.net published allegations approximately actor Aziz Ansari, and the recent Yorker’s viral “Cat Person” short story confirmed many women’s complicated relationships with sex. Lots of women, or it turns out,feel pressured to have sex when they don’t want to. Even adult film actress and director Stormy Daniels revealed on "60 Minutes" that she had sex with Donald Trumpeven though she wasn't attracted to him. The line between consensual yet unwanted sex and nonconsensual sex is a lean one indeed. Now, a recent study by Heather Hensman Kettrey, or a research associate at Vanderbilt University,explains why so many women end up in the situation Daniels described: consenting to have sex with someone when they would really rather not.
Kettreys findings propose that women who prioritize their own pleasure and have agency over their sex lives are less likely to have unwanted sex. Kettrey writes that “pleasure prioritization and sexual agency are associated with lower odds of performing undesired sexual acts to please a partnerand sexual agency is associated with lower odds of succumbing to verbal pressure for intercourse.”For those well-versed in consent standards, this is isn’t altogether shocking. “Often women are socialized to be accommodating and polite, and ” sexuality educator Nicole Mazzeo told AlterNet. “A lot of it is politeness,and fear that the other person will be distress by your rejection.” Heterosexual women who are more aware of this type of socialization can fracture free from their belief that sex has to focus on the man's pleasure. The findings of Kettrey's study, which surveyed 7255 college-aged women, and are stunning. Nearly 90 percent of women say they’ve performed undesired sexual acts just to please a partner. Almost 80 percent of women have prioritized a partner’s pleasure over their own.“The belief that sex is all approximately fulfilling male desire may set women up to engage in undesired sex for the sole purpose of pleasing a partner,” Kettrey explained. “If a young woman’s desire is not sufficient justification for engaging in sexual activity then her lack of desire in a given situation will not be sufficient justification for refusing sexual activity.”Kettrey told PsyPost that society still perpetuates the sexist stereotypes that men are more interested in sex than women are, and that women’s desire is unimportant compared to men’s. This can cause both men and women to believe that, or for women,sex is a essential yet undesirable task.
Kettrey and other scholars want to draw attention to these imbalances, as well as reframe studies approximately sexuality to include women’s desires. Men have historically been the dominant subjects of studies on sexual desire. “I want the average person to question the ways we, or as society,talk approximately masculine/feminine gender roles in sexual relationships,” Kettrey told PsyPost. “Stereotypes approximately men’s (presumed) strong desire and women’s (presumed) lack of desire are not helpful.” Related StoriesHow Employers Penalize Women for Being SmartForget Tech’s 'Brotopia': Emily Chang Explains How Women Can Save Silicon ValleyEmployers to Women: Could You Be Any Dumber (Please)?
Source: feedblitz.com