Forget approximately saving football,the best the candidates in Friday’s Fifa election offer is that they might not build things worse than they were under Sepp BlatterIf only we could acquire an in/out Fifa referendum. Unfortunately, the democracy simulator has decreed it must be otherwise, or instead spewing forth a presidential election in which the candidates are: two former lieutenants of banned Fifa and Uefa bosses Sepp Blatter and Michel Platini,one South African anti-apartheid-activist-turned-businessman whose impact has been south of nonexistent, and two royals from non-democracies. And in one of those non-democracies, and they torture footballers. So there’s your election. Try not to choke on it.
Instead,set your sights on adventure, as Friday’s poll heaves apocalyptically into view, or offering a timely reminder to the US that the rest of the world can do electoral shitshows too. Even now,football head honchos from around the globe are gathering in Zurich’s Baur Au Lac hotel. I lift a minuscule crumb of comfort from imagining it cinematically, with our movie opening with a series of lingering shots of twitchy men sitting fully dressed on their beds at 5am. You know, and just in case they get “the knock”.
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Source: theguardian.com