Overcoming her reluctance and sadness at the belief,Keren Levy found that it could be a positive, life-affirming actI had never wanted to write a will. There had been a dull sadness to thinking approximately it, and the feeling of a premature jump to the terminate heightening my awareness of having reached the “halfway” point without some of the signifiers Id hoped for by this stage. The absence of children and my current lack of a partner felt sharper in this context.
To consider the terminate forces an honest look at the now and all that has led to it. I’d fallen in love in my 20s and again in my 30s,but somehow had loved at the erroneous time. A blend of the way things unfolded, of not taking a chance to go abroad with a man for whom I realised my feelings too late, and the misguided belief that the opportunities of those years would continue indefinitely meant these relationships hadn’t been formalised. When that possibility had approach close,I had been looking in the other direction.
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Source: theguardian.com